Failure as an Intern

As a teacher I dread a lot of things, but the one that I dread more than anything else in this world is becoming a failure in the classroom in front of children. I had this idea that all lessons should go as planned and that never should I have to worry about being a failure. If something did go wrong it would so slight that it would be unnoticeable to the students. As I figured out Monday, I am human, and, as a human, I will fail.

I prepared Thursday and Friday for a class discussion on Monday. As I figured out later, the students were very prepared for the discussion. Their notes were there and they had good ideas. My first period class went as planned and we had a great discussion. Second period was a bit of a problem. They came in, plopped down, and did not move. They would not talk, except to hold a little side conversation every now and then. Only eight students participated in the class discussion. I had this long pause were I decided I was not putting up with this horror any longer. I got up and I told the students that they could write a paragraph for me instead.

I have been dealing with this all week long. I have worried that I did something wrong. I was trying to allow the students to take control and lead the class, as teacher evaluation asks teachers to do. It flopped for me. As I look back on the situation and the moment I realize that I cannot take all the blame and must pick myself up and move forward—not allowing this to hinder me. I will not stop class discussions just because one class decided to sit on me.